Fools Like Me

Here I am again on the road that I often travel, and often times I end up bruised or scraped a knee. But nevertheless when I get to the junction where I have to choose between these two roads: 1.) smooth and safe 2.) unpredictable; full of surprises. I always choose the latter. It’s not that I’m a masochist or anything like it, only that I want challenges and I don’t want to dwell on what ifs. I want to see what awaits for me at the end of the road. Whether it’s a happy ending or not, I don’t really care. At least I’ve tried. And that alone can let me sleep at night not wondering what could be and what not. I love taking risks even if its my own heart that’s at stake.

But I don’t know, I feel like I’m cursed or something… I want to borrow a line from Janet Jackson ‘every time I fall in love it seems to never last’ that best describes it. And more often than not I always fall for guys who think they are born just to play and fool around. And more often than not I’m always in a relationship situation that’s indefinable. The pseudo ones:almost but not quite. Ha! But sometimes it lasts longer than you can imagine, but still it’s just not the real deal.

And here I am again… risking it all for the nth time. But now, it’ll be different. I’ll play my cards well. And I won’t invest as much as I used to. I just hate it when I don’t know if what he’s saying is true or he’s just being funny? I really don’t know! No matter how I try to convince myself that I should just play cool and all, but still my convincing powers doesn’t work and my heart still hopes. I just hope it works and in the end it’ll be a win-win situation.

“Fools like me. How we love blindly. And the cracks won’t count. It’s got to break in front of me.”