Crossing the Bridge

I don't really feel like blogging today but on second thought I just felt that I need to let my thoughts out. So, here I am trying to "let it all out" . It's been two weeks since we came back from our Big Fat Greek Holiday and since mom left for Zamboanga. I'm really missing her and other family members already. I miss my dad and mom (my grandparents, we call them dad and mom) so much. Especially now that my dad is sickly. I am dying to come home to the province, I want to see them so badly. I miss my daddy so much!

Also, I've been very confused this past week. I'm the kind of person that 'crosses the bridge when I get there', but here I am right at the start of the bridge and undecided whether to cross or not to cross. I'm in the point that I need to decide if I would like to stay or leave in what I have and what I am now.

I am tempted to leave, there's a part of me thinks that there may be greener pastures and greater heights that awaits me somewhere if I'll leave, but there's also this little voice inside me that's having cold feet. What if I'll leave now and found out later that the pasture is greener and the heights are greater here than in the place that I'll be if I'll leave? What if I fail? And what if I’ll loose the chance of a lifetime if I will stay? Sigh. I think I’m going crazy weighing things out. This is really a tough and hard point of my life. Any decision I’ll choose will make my life turn 360 degrees, and there’s no way of turning it back just the way it is.

I need all the enlightenment that I could get.